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Sarah blogs Eurovision, part 3
May. 20th, 2006 09:02 pmWhat could the Greeks come up with to top the pop-tastic Greek gods singing Eurovision winners intro of the semifinal?
A siren singing, a golden ball with wing-waving people stuck to the outside descending from the heavens, dolphins doing forward rolls and dancers in the sky.
And then the presenters flew in from the sky. Like you do. Then last year's winner got to reprise her triumphant bouncy poppy number, with dancers flying around the sky hanging from elastic bands.
Aaaaand here we go......
Switzerland - six4one, If we all give a little Never mind S Club 7, this multinational manufactured six-piece band was clearly cynically thrown together to attract as many votes as possible from the countries that supplied the singers. And the song was utter tosh. Three girls, three boys, taking it in turns to sing lines about love and peace and happiness and all that crap. Not even amusingly bad. Just pish.
Moldova - Arsenium and Natalia Gordienko, Loca What can the plucky Moldovans come up with after last year's triumph of Granny in her rocking chair? Well, the three boy - three girl combination was far better than the Swiss mess. The tinkly number didn't really go anywhere but was jolly enough. Natalia kept vanishing behind a sail-shaped screen and every time she reemerged part of her costume had vanished, until she came out for hte final time wearing what looked like a gold mini wedding dress.
Israel - Eddie Butler, Together we are one White-suited Eddie started off draped over a piano. Verse in Hebrew, chorus in English, cheesy MOR tosh. With the essential Eurovision key-change, of course, and some terrible sub-Mariah Carey wailing from one of the five similarly white-clad backing singers. He thinks he's Alexander O'Neal. But Alexander O'Neal can sing in tune. Our Eddie can't.
Latvia - Cosmos, I hear your heart Now here's a novelty. They forgot the band. Six boys in white suits, singing and percussing a capella, with added boy band dance moves. Different. And peculiar. What was the robot puppet that appeared at the end all about?
Norway - Christine Guldbrandsen, Alvedansen That's three in a row in white outfits now. Pretty blonde gir, with five pretty, and largely blonde, backing singers, two with violinists. Nice enough, but pretty unmemorable – a slow rocky ballady type affair. And the wind machine's back. I'm sure some of the entries I accidentally saw in their qualifying competition when I was in Norway in January were better than this!
Spain - Las Ketchup, Bloody Mary Ketchup by name, ketchup by outfit. Four birds wearing bright red shouty-sang (out of tune!) their way through a heavily choreographed routine with office chairs and a couple of ballet dancers in boots. Even that terrible ketchup song that infected the charts a couple of years back was better. Bag o' shite.
Malta - Fabrizio Faniello, I do What a strange looking boy. I think it's the eyebrows. It looks like he's got a serious monobrow but isn't very good at plucking them. Aaaaand.... it's cheesy upbeat Europop of the highest order, with the inevitable scantily clad birds prancing around behind him. His tuning wasn't brilliant, either. But he got the key-change in. And some fireworks. Well, he looked like he was enjoying himself, anyway.
Germany - Texas lightning, No no never Bloody hell, it's country & western. What's going on? Blonde fluffy pink-clad bird singing, with a four-piece band of blokes in stetsons – drummer, gee-tarrrr, double bass and banjo. Happy C&W? What's wrong with 'My boyfriend left me, there's a pain in my head, the weather is shocking and the dog is dead?' C&W should be miserable, however bouncy the music!
Denmark - Sidsel Ben Semmane, Twist of love Now this is quite fun. Sidsel and her four girly compatriots are dressed in gold, the tune is catchy, and the moves are good, even if their twist is all talk and no action. And the instrumental break involves a break-dancer. First one I've actually liked this evening.
Russia - Dima, Never let you go The first of the qualifiers to appear tonight. According to El Tel Wogan, Dima is a big sex symbol in eastern Europe. I can't quite see why. Maybe if he shaved that terrible mullet off he would be good looking, but it's rather difficult to see past it. Tonight he's written '10' on his vest (it was '13' on Thursday), so we don't forget what number he is and vote for him. He's found some proper numbers this time, and it doesn' t look like he scrawled it on with a marker pen during a last-minute trip to the bogs. That dancer in the piano is still bloody strange. But the song's not that bad.
FYR Macedonia - Elena Risteska, Ninanajna Such a long country name it takes up two lines on the scorecard. And it's that bird in a spangly red vest and micro-shorts again. The Kids from Fame are on form, but it sounds like she's singing in a different key from her backing band tonight. Not a good move.
Romania - Mihai Traistariu, Tornero The most blatent piece of Europop yet. Dig that electronic thunk-thunk backing tape. Young Mihai seems to have had an argument with a bleach bottle and he's gone ginger. Ick.Underneath all the vocal gymnastics he's probably a pretty good singer. Another Kids from Fame inspired bunch of dancers. Aaaaaand another rather super key-change. One day we'll get two in one song. Now that would be something to look forward to.
It's half-way through so I'll post this now and be back later with the rest.......
A siren singing, a golden ball with wing-waving people stuck to the outside descending from the heavens, dolphins doing forward rolls and dancers in the sky.
And then the presenters flew in from the sky. Like you do. Then last year's winner got to reprise her triumphant bouncy poppy number, with dancers flying around the sky hanging from elastic bands.
Aaaaand here we go......
Switzerland - six4one, If we all give a little Never mind S Club 7, this multinational manufactured six-piece band was clearly cynically thrown together to attract as many votes as possible from the countries that supplied the singers. And the song was utter tosh. Three girls, three boys, taking it in turns to sing lines about love and peace and happiness and all that crap. Not even amusingly bad. Just pish.
Moldova - Arsenium and Natalia Gordienko, Loca What can the plucky Moldovans come up with after last year's triumph of Granny in her rocking chair? Well, the three boy - three girl combination was far better than the Swiss mess. The tinkly number didn't really go anywhere but was jolly enough. Natalia kept vanishing behind a sail-shaped screen and every time she reemerged part of her costume had vanished, until she came out for hte final time wearing what looked like a gold mini wedding dress.
Israel - Eddie Butler, Together we are one White-suited Eddie started off draped over a piano. Verse in Hebrew, chorus in English, cheesy MOR tosh. With the essential Eurovision key-change, of course, and some terrible sub-Mariah Carey wailing from one of the five similarly white-clad backing singers. He thinks he's Alexander O'Neal. But Alexander O'Neal can sing in tune. Our Eddie can't.
Latvia - Cosmos, I hear your heart Now here's a novelty. They forgot the band. Six boys in white suits, singing and percussing a capella, with added boy band dance moves. Different. And peculiar. What was the robot puppet that appeared at the end all about?
Norway - Christine Guldbrandsen, Alvedansen That's three in a row in white outfits now. Pretty blonde gir, with five pretty, and largely blonde, backing singers, two with violinists. Nice enough, but pretty unmemorable – a slow rocky ballady type affair. And the wind machine's back. I'm sure some of the entries I accidentally saw in their qualifying competition when I was in Norway in January were better than this!
Spain - Las Ketchup, Bloody Mary Ketchup by name, ketchup by outfit. Four birds wearing bright red shouty-sang (out of tune!) their way through a heavily choreographed routine with office chairs and a couple of ballet dancers in boots. Even that terrible ketchup song that infected the charts a couple of years back was better. Bag o' shite.
Malta - Fabrizio Faniello, I do What a strange looking boy. I think it's the eyebrows. It looks like he's got a serious monobrow but isn't very good at plucking them. Aaaaand.... it's cheesy upbeat Europop of the highest order, with the inevitable scantily clad birds prancing around behind him. His tuning wasn't brilliant, either. But he got the key-change in. And some fireworks. Well, he looked like he was enjoying himself, anyway.
Germany - Texas lightning, No no never Bloody hell, it's country & western. What's going on? Blonde fluffy pink-clad bird singing, with a four-piece band of blokes in stetsons – drummer, gee-tarrrr, double bass and banjo. Happy C&W? What's wrong with 'My boyfriend left me, there's a pain in my head, the weather is shocking and the dog is dead?' C&W should be miserable, however bouncy the music!
Denmark - Sidsel Ben Semmane, Twist of love Now this is quite fun. Sidsel and her four girly compatriots are dressed in gold, the tune is catchy, and the moves are good, even if their twist is all talk and no action. And the instrumental break involves a break-dancer. First one I've actually liked this evening.
Russia - Dima, Never let you go The first of the qualifiers to appear tonight. According to El Tel Wogan, Dima is a big sex symbol in eastern Europe. I can't quite see why. Maybe if he shaved that terrible mullet off he would be good looking, but it's rather difficult to see past it. Tonight he's written '10' on his vest (it was '13' on Thursday), so we don't forget what number he is and vote for him. He's found some proper numbers this time, and it doesn' t look like he scrawled it on with a marker pen during a last-minute trip to the bogs. That dancer in the piano is still bloody strange. But the song's not that bad.
FYR Macedonia - Elena Risteska, Ninanajna Such a long country name it takes up two lines on the scorecard. And it's that bird in a spangly red vest and micro-shorts again. The Kids from Fame are on form, but it sounds like she's singing in a different key from her backing band tonight. Not a good move.
Romania - Mihai Traistariu, Tornero The most blatent piece of Europop yet. Dig that electronic thunk-thunk backing tape. Young Mihai seems to have had an argument with a bleach bottle and he's gone ginger. Ick.Underneath all the vocal gymnastics he's probably a pretty good singer. Another Kids from Fame inspired bunch of dancers. Aaaaaand another rather super key-change. One day we'll get two in one song. Now that would be something to look forward to.
It's half-way through so I'll post this now and be back later with the rest.......
